MTV Video Music Awards 2011 - Damn I'm old

It's Sunday night, and it's the MTV Video Music Awards!! I go to people.com after the show has started, and first thing I read is Beyonce is pregnant!!! She looks amazing.

I start watching this show, and guess what I realized? I'm old.
This show isn't as funny, and I don't even know half of these artists. Yeah I'm old. So here is my "old" persons review of this award.

The opening act is Lady Gaga. Always uping herself, she comes out, dressed like a mix between Ralph Macchio circa Karate Kid, and John Travolta circa Grease. Oh my! Her "acting" I wish she would leave to Saturday Night Live, but her voice is awesome as always.

Ok so Kevin Hart is apparently a comedian (never heard of him, I actually had to google his name, becuase I didnt know if it was Hart/Hert/Heart). Whatever. He keeps going on and on and on about him NOT being the host. And guess what what else I learned during his "non-host" opening. He is NOT even funny. Annoying as hell actually. Yeah, I'm old. I think if I was 16, I would be laughing. Since I've never even watched an episode of "the Jersey Shore" in my life, his "jokes" are becoming less and less funny.

Best Pop video - Britney Spears. She's back with her manager Larry Rudolph. Remember when she shaved off her head and went crazy? That's all I think about when I see Britney. Love you Britney, think you are a great dancer and lip syncer, but can't forget that photo of you with the shaved head, and the umbrella attacking the paparazzi. (This is where if I wasnt so new to blogging, I would insert that picture here)

So who is this "Katy Perry" looking girl singing us off to commercial land with cover songs? Anyone? Anyone?

And we're back! Its Jay Z and Kanye West. What am I thinking of? Wasn't it just a couple of years ago that Kanye ran onstage during Taylor Swifts acceptance speech? Yep, I just googled that too. 2009. Sad. I'm not thinking of anything else except him being an ass to Taylor two years ago.
Alrighty...song is over. They came out, and I heard "scream". Then another "scream". Big puff of smoke, they are gone.

Ahhhh Miley Cyrus. When I see/hear her, I think of when my daughter was a baby, and would cry. I was always afraid if she cried too long, she would strain her vocal chords and end up having a smokers voice like Miley.

Commmercial - The Real World is still going??? Damn, I remember the 1st one in New York. With HOT Eric Nies. I just went to Wikipedia and found out the original Real World started in 1992. Damn I'm OLD!

Beastie Boys of the future!! Will Ferrell, Jack Black and Seth Rogan!! Whoo Hoo, people I recognize!! Oh wait, a group had come out and I have no clue who they are. They are doing a category for best hip hop video. Yeah, I dont know any of these songs.

We are back from commercial. WHY am I blogging about this? All this is doing is reiterating how fucking old I am. Wait! They just said one of the songs up for nomination for best collaboration is Katy Perry E.T. I actually KNOW this song! Love how she makes a dig at Kayne about interrupting. Awww...Russell Brand is standing up chapping for his wife! Love it!

Katy Perry (not loving the hair color) announcing Adele - LOVE THIS WOMAN!! Damn she can sing!! (Well, normally. This performance is not the best. She's not really hitting those low notes)

Oh my...like this woman has not been in the news enough recently, we have to see Kim Kardashian again. Notice how Kris (Humphries) is no where around. Just like all those wedding pictures that have been put out. Its Kim world people. We just live in it. (Why the hell couldn't I have a sister who made a sex tape???? KIDDING) Justin Bieber is the winner of this category. Again, I'm so damn old the only song I know of his is that "Baby, baby, baby, ooooohhh"

Hmmm Chris Brown is performing. My finger has the urge to hit the FF button. Can't look at him without thinking of him beating up Rhianna. Kid can dance though. Gotta give that to him. Its like a mix of Usher and Michael Jackson. Nice - Nirvana!!! He's been onstage about 2 mins now, and he has sang once. Whats up with those Hannibal back up dancers? Damn, Kanye West is out of his seat. Don't know if its because he's enjoying the performance, or if he's gonna hop on stage and beat his ass... Alright, the performance has become a Cirque du Solel performance with the wires and acrobatics... Did Chris Brown sing at all?

Oh there is is that girl singing cover songs - now it's "Scrubs" by TLC. Seriously, who the hell is she?

Lady Gaga (Ralph Macchio/John Travolta) is back. OMG. Hang pictures of Britney Spears on her/his wall and touch her/himself?

BRITNEY!!!!!!! Oh I love the this tribute to Britney!!! This is showing the Britney back when she was fucking HOT! And before she lost her mind! "Hit me baby one more time" "Oops I did it again" "Crazy" "Toxic" "Circus" "Hold it against me" "Slave for you" Wait, these are all like teenagers doing these dances! THAT WAS FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!!! OK, I'm so glad my old ass is watching this right now!
Wait, this is Britney's award, and she announces Beyonce? I dont get this.
But Beyonce is awesome, so I can't wait to watch. That baby is gonna come out dancing. She's jumping a little too much (in heels) for a pregnant woman, but hey, I'm not Beyonce. She can do it all. She's a superstar.
---cut to Katy Perry in the crowd, WTF is she wearing???--
Awww I LOVE it! She undid her jacket and showed off that baby belly!!! Maternity pants and all!! Jay Z was BEAMING!!!!! Saluted his wife and all! Have to rewind that one a few times! :) Damn, that woman knows how to put on a performance!!! YAY! :)

OK Lady Gaga, not breaking character is cool, and at the same time a little frightening. LOL

Russell Brand is now coming out and speaking a few words about Amy Winehouse. Nice message about alcoholism. How awesome the clip of Amy Winehouse and Tony Bennett! Love it.

Katie Holmes is announcing video of the year nominees?? Tom Cruise allowed her out? Katy Perry so deserved to win for "Firework". I love that song. How can you not be happy when you hear that song?

OK, VMA's are over. I feel older. But there were some awesome parts. Britney dance tribute, Beyonce showing her baby belly, and Tony Bennett.

"Hey baby lets go to Vegas"

"Hey baby lets go to Vegas - Kiss the single life goodbye - hey baby lets go to Vegas - Bet on love and let it ride"  Faith Hill - Lets Go To Vegas

Las Vegas is on my mind....lets make a few things clear - I'm a stay at home mommy of 2 babies, so sadly, I will not be going to Vegas any time soon. Whaaa...  OK chin up, time to type.
During the day, if possible that both kids are napping at the same time, I will put on "The Girls Next Door" you know with Holly Madison, Bridget Marquardt, Kendra Wilkinson, and of course HEF!
Anyway, I'm watching episodes of them going to Vegas. Flying in on a private jet, staying at the Palms, greeted by the Maloofs, sleeping(?) in the Hugh Hefner suite, and money to play at the high roller tables. But unlike "The Girls Next Door" I don't get VIP tickets to Beatles shows, O, and I don't have a mansion staff/bodyguards at my beck and call.
.
That's sooooooo far from MY Vegas experience.
I stayed at the Golden Nugget. I actually LOVE that hotel, how its on Fremont St, and it has TWO Starbucks in the hotel oh yeah, and since I stayed there before, my rooms were COMPED! WHOO HOO!  The pool is impressive, it has a shark tank and there is a slide that goes thru the shark tank.  But I'm the girl playing the penny slot machines, and will be brave and hit a roulette table occasionally.

Did you know that we got married in Vegas?  A planned wedding.  We didnt just go hop on a plane and say "lets do it!". We had a fun wedding, I did the whole gown/veil, he rented a tux, and  bridesmaides dresses., and a photographer.and not only is she gorgeous (she looks like Shania Twain to me) and her website. We LOVED her. Here is a plug for our photographer. Her name is Urszula, and her website is www.perlablue.com  She was amazing, professional, and reasonably priced! HIGHLY recommend!!!

My only thing I regret is not seeing a Carrot Top show while I was in Vegas. (You may learn more about my love with Carrot Top - seriously, not a joke - thru future blogs.)

I heard and saw some youtube videos that now in addition to the Fremont St experience they have a ZIPLINE!  How awesome is that??!  Dang, I wanna go!  I'm more of the Golden Nugget girl.  The "strip" is the fun place to be during the day and you can see the lions that were used in the Siegfreid & Roy show, and of course the Bellagio fountains. And my most FAVORITE bar in Las Vegas is O'Sheas. Total hole in the wall bar/casino, and I LOVED it. It was a place to get some drinks, gamble, and you didn't need to break out the GPS to locate your friends or the bathroom.
I enjoyed walking on the strip during the day, but once it got dark, I was afraid some drunk person was going to throw up on me, So I was perfectly happy going back to the Golden Nugget and having my nightly "Fremont Street Experience" right outside my hotel door.

Now I have all these Vegas songs stuck in my head now:
Katy Perry - "Wakin up in Vegas"
"Shut up and put your money where your mouth is - thats what you get for wakin up in Vegas - Get up and shake the glitter off your clothes now - thats what you get for waking up in Vegas"
And of course - we can not forget the King! Mr. ELVIS PRESLEY and "Viva Las Vegas"
"Bright light city gonna set my soul, gonna set my soul on fire"

And ironically the TV show Las Vegas with James Caan, Josh Duhamel opening title was "A Little Less Conversation" by Elvis Presley.  After being pronounced man and wife, thats the song we chose to walk up the aisle to. LOVED out wedding.  LOVED Vegas. (except that the damn static electricity got me everytime I moved!) But great memories, great town, and someday I hope to return.

Until then, I get to watch shows about Vegas, people with a hell of a lot more money than me visiting Vegas, and doing the wild and crazy things that you're supposed to do when you go there. :)